Keeping kids in sport - A collection of resources for parents & coaches
- Anna Walker
- May 21, 2025
- 5 min read
Updated: May 21
By Anna Walker
Updated 21st May 2026
Which parties have the biggest influence over a child's enjoyment of sport? Arguably, the parents/carers - and the coach.
These are also the people that (often) don't get a training manual... So, we've made a list of some of our favourite resources, all in the theme of helping you create sporting cultures, support systems and experiences your kids will want to stick with.
This summary brings together the key ideas, evidence, and practical advocacy tips from a collection of trusted resources. Full explanations, research links and detailed resources included further below.
The Snapshot:
Prioritise belonging over performance: Kids are more likely to stay involved when they feel included, supported and seen - not just selected, ranked or praised for performance. Be mindful of environments where the “best” players receive disproportionate attention or opportunity. Every child matters. [FNO: Talent Bias, 2024]
Praise effort, learning and teamwork: Focus feedback on courage, improvement, persistence, kindness and teamwork rather than winning or comparison. Children thrive when adults believe everyone can develop. [Ref: Positive Coaching / Dweck]
Don’t rush specialisation: Diverse sporting experiences through childhood support confidence, physical literacy, enjoyment and long-term participation. Early specialisation can increase burnout and dropout risk. [Ref: When to Specialise]
Watch for signs sport is becoming harmful: Excessive pressure, benching, humiliation, public criticism, overtraining and constant comparison can damage confidence and wellbeing - even when unintentional. [FNO: Talent Bias, 2024]
Measure success differently: A successful season isn't only about finals, trophies or representative teams. Ask:
Did children make friends?
Feel safe and included?
Grow in confidence?
Want to come back next year? [FNO: Participant-Led Systems]
Challenge exclusion respectfully: If something feels unfair or overly exclusive, ask constructive questions like:
“How are we ensuring all kids feel valued and develop?”
“How are participant experiences being monitored?”
“What does success look like beyond winning?”
Focus on improving culture, not attacking people. [FNO: PX Approach]
Remember why most kids play sport: Fun. Friendship. Belonging. Movement. Community. Adults have enormous influence over whether those needs are protected — or overshadowed.[Ref: Sports Parent Guidelines]
What Are Participant-Led Systems?
It's the way all the parts of the sporting environment work together to ensure the lived experience of children, families and communities are at the centre of sport design and decision-making.
They begin locally — through listening, inclusive conversations, shared values and small culture shifts that help every child feel like they belong in sport, regardless of talent, background or ability.
Call to Action
Start the conversation in your club, school or community. Ask participants how sport feels for them - not just how they performed. Advocate for systems that prioritise belonging, wellbeing and lifelong participation alongside development and competition.
For parents and leaders wanting the bigger-picture thinking behind this movement, explore the full article on participant-led systems.
The Detailed Guide
Take a look and let us know what we're missing!
Website
New to the sport parenting or coaching gig? This site offers essential (but sometimes little-known) tips for both audiences, and we strongly encourage you to check out their great videos featuring some of Aotearoa New Zealand's best athletes and coaches. Unlike the rest of this list, this link includes a bunch of fabulous videos and information. But trust us, it's worth the time to explore them!
Great resources - great work BeSportive.Kiwi !!!
Youtube
Love this from the Positive Coaching Network and Carol Dweck on 'the new psychology of success'. Pigeonholing children as 'talented' while limiting the opportunities of others too early can be highly problematic for both cohorts.
“When the coaches believe everybody can develop, then you see talent sprouting up from everywhere. From places you might not have imagined. Also, when you take that emphasis off talent, you start emphasising teamwork. When kids aren’t worried ‘am I the star’ or ‘am I talented’ they start working together more easily. As we know, great teams are about chemistry, not individual stars.”
Article
Is your child focusing in on a particular sport before the age of 16?
There are many positives to keeping children's activities diverse at least until this age, and risks to specialisation worth knowing about.
This article provides a solid summary of a now very-well researched and known topic all parents and coaches should be briefed on.
Article
How much is too much, when it comes to youth sport? If you're wanting to maximise benefit and minimise harm to your child during their early years of sport, this offers a great guide to how much is too little, what's just right and just as importantly, what's too much? And what's the right range of sport to set them up for healthy, lifelong sports participation? A great read.
Article
Talent Identification is an important part of youth sport. But how, and when, we begin the Talent ID process can have a profound impact on the sporting experiences we give young people — and increasingly, research supports the case for delaying the IDing of talent.
Balance is Better is another wonderful Kiwi resource worth exploring. Signing up for their newsletter will get you regular, world-class resources backed by strong evidence.
Podcast
#sportsparents, how can we support our kids through sports trials? Some kids love them... For others, it can be nerve-wracking and lead to drop out. We don't always have control over the process. But we can ensure we're supporting our kids as best we possibly can. A great listen for parents with kids fronting up to these daunting events.
Youtube Clip
What if delaying specialisation, rethinking talent ID, and putting kids first actually led to greater success?
If you’re worried that a more child-centred approach might harm elite success, just look at Norway.
“Big nations are all about selection, getting rid of people. Norway allows children who are 'late developers', or whose parents could not support them, time to find their potential.”
— Tore Ovrebo, Head of Elite Sports
So, what fuels Norway’s huge talent pool and sporting success?
A ‘Joy of Sport for All’ approach embedded across the system
No scorekeeping or ladders until age 13
Open and encouraged code & club switching
Later specialisation, keeping doors open for all
Competition exists—but not at the cost of development or lifelong love of sport
A system where every child has a chance to stay and thrive—prioritising safety, friendships, and child-led decision-making
Imagine if we built a system like this. What could it mean for our kids, our communities, and even our elite success?
Watch the video & tell us what you think!
Article
This article explores how we may be inadvertently leading our children to drop out of sport through practices that undermine their sense of self worth and confidence. It offers examples of preferential treatment to look out for alongside their alternatives. Practices that build up all children, enhance their enjoyment of sport and keep them engaged for longer.
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